Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings | Golfing Humor - Page 2

Golf is a game in which you yell “fore,” shoot six, and write down five.
– Paul Harvey

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Golf is an unusual game. When you have a good day, you can’t wait to get back out there, and when you have a bad day, you can’t wait to get back out there.

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Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

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Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards ?
– Al Boliska

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I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
– Ben Hogan

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I know I’m getting better at golf because I’m hitting fewer spectators.
– Gerald Ford

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Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill- designed for the purpose.
– Winston Churchill

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Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
– P.J. O’Rourke

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I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.
– G. K. Chesterton

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You’ve just got one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you’ve hit it.
– Sam Snead

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Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
– Tiger Woods

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The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
– Phyllis Diller

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The most important shot in golf is the next one.
– Ben Hogan

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Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
– Harry Vardon

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The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf – it’s almost a law.
– H. G. Wells

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I don’t want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.
– Rogers Hornsby

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My most consistent and reliable shot is always the double at the 19th.

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You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex- wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
– Lee Trevino

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I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.
– Buddy Hackett

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I’d rather have my worst day on the golf course, than my best day at work.

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